I haven't posted in quite a while, and for a very simple reason. I am not really sure if I am qualified to give advice at the moment. Since my last post we have moved to a different state, and most of what I have worked on has not worked out that well. So instead of posting about what to do, ideas and insights like that, I thought I'd spend some time posting things I know far better, what not to do.
So in honor of so many of my friends getting engages, here are some ideas on what NOT to do when you're going to propose.
- Put the ring in your pocket, fill the ring box with toothpicks and at the end of dinner open the box with both hands and offer her a tootpick.
- Follow behind her and when she stops, get down on one knee... to tie your shoe.. repeatedly.
- Ask her to hold your phone because you told your buddies you'd put them on speakerphone when you proposed.
- Anything involving Crackerjacks or Secret Codes.
- Order alchohal and say anything like "I need a stiff drink before I do this."
- Place the stone anywhere she can swallow it, hoping that she'll find it. She won't, the ER guys will.
- Begin every statement with "I love you so much, will you..." and then saying whatever you want.
- Spend time with your future in-laws, unless you really don't want to get married.
- Have an ex-girlfriend there to hand you the ring so you can propose.
- Break her leg so your friends at ER can slip the ring into her IV bag.
- Using smoke signals from a forest fire, that you set to show your love.
- Say anything along the lines of "this is where I always propose."
As for the right way? I have no idea.
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